So The Cool Wall for the drivers.

Jenson Button: Well he is the reigning world champion. He is British. He is dating a model. He is proving his doubters wrong. We all thought Lewis Hamilton would be better than JB but we're wrong. Jenson Button is without a doubt Sub-Zero.

Lewis Hamilton: He is a known rule-breaker. He drives aggressively. He dates the only pussycat doll people have heard of. He is the youngest person ever to win the F1 championship. He has been labeled a dickhead. He has the support of Damon Hill. He out drove the F1 champion in his rookie season. On the flip side Bernie Eccelstone is a fan. Despite this Lewis Hamilton is Sub-Zero.

Michael Schumacher: 1994. 1995, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004. Count them. Michael Schumacher is Sub-Zero.

Nico Rosberg: He looks like the typical pretty boy. As soon as he goes home I bet he sorts out his hair. Sorry Nico you are Uncool.

Sebastian Vettel: Well he has been on pole 3/4 times. He won the race where he was not on pole. That's bad. It gets worse. Sebastian Vettel calls his car "Luscious Liz". This makes Sebastian Vettel Seriously Uncool.

Mark Webber: He is performing worse than his seriously uncool teammate. Mark is a great guy but for now he is Uncool.

Felipe Massa: He is back after a head injury and he lead the championship after race 3. I think it's tough to argue. Felipe Massa is Cool.

Fernando Alonso: A two time world champion, a race winner this season. How can he not be cool? Simple, he is a cock. He left McLaren because Lewis Hamilton was faster. He pushed ahead of Massa in the pit lane in the last race. Ferrari have said they have nothing to do with that. We have the F1 cock. Fernando Alonso is Seriously Uncool.

Rubens Barrichello: He is just so likable. He's been around for a long time and deserves a good spot on the cool wall after the luck he's had. Rubens Barrichello is Cool.

Nico Hülkenberg: Nico who? Exactly. The reigning GP2 champion has no points so far and he should get some. End of. Nico Hülkenberg is Uncool.

Robert Kubica: He is outperforming his Renault. He is challenging for the world championship. He is however friends with Fernando Alonso. That makes Uncool.

Vitaly Petrov: He is Russian. He isn't afraid of the big boys. He has the support of Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin. He has achieved a points finish in his 4th race. He is actually Sub-Zero.

Adrian Sutil: He drives for Force India. Despite being Lewis Hamilton's best friend he is Uncool.

Vitantnio Liuzzi: He drives for Force India. That's that. Liuzzi is Uncool.

Sebastien Buemi: He beat his team mate last year and is now getting a taste of his own medicine. Buemi is Seriously Uncool.

Jaime Alguersuari: Jaime is the guy who is giving Sebastien Buemi a taste of his own medicine. Jaime Alguersuari is Sub-Zero.

Jarno Trulli: This has has been around in F1 for way too long and done way too little. Now he's complaining about his car. Shut up and get Racing. Jarno is Seriously Uncool.

Heikki Kovalaienen: He is making the most of his Lotus team. After stuggles with McLaren the pressure is off and he is doing quite well. I have therefor decided to label Hekki as a Cool driver.

Karun Chandhok: Don't ask me to explain it. I don't get why but I just think this guy is cool. I just don't get it. Karun Chandhok is Cool.

Bruno Senna: Thanks to his last name he is cool. This however comes under the condition that he produces results. I do not want to see another Nelson Piquet Jr. If I do, Bruno will be the most uncool driver on the grid. For now though, Bruno Senna is Cool.

Pedro de la Rosa: I'm in two minds. He is receiving stick from his boss, but I think it is unjust. I'm putting his fate in the hands of his next performance. For now he is Uncool.

Kamui Kobayashi: He is failing to live up to his hype. That is annoying and certainly not cool. Kamui Kobayashi is Seriously Uncool.

Timo Glock: He is being outperformed by his rookie team mate. His decision to join Virgin was admiralble but not cool. Timo Glock is Uncool.

Lucas di Grassi: He is beating his team mate. He is Brazillian. He is a rookie. He is Cool.

The Cool Wall

This is my way of apologizing for the long wait for the last entry. It is for the first time on this blog, time for my very own Cool Wall, Top Gear style. For those of you that don't know the cool wall, it is divided into four categories. Seriously Uncool, Uncool, Cool, and Sub-Zero.

I have looked at all the drivers and teams and decided which ones I think are cool. So here we go.

Firstly the teams:

McLaren: McLaren are known rule breakers, have an all British line up and they're British drivers are the two most recent World Champions. They were also found guilty of spying on Ferrari. I don't think anyone can argue. McLaren are Sub-Zero.

Mercedes: Mercedes are driving two German drivers under the guidence of Ross Brawn. One of those drivers is seven time world champion Michael Schumacher. That alone makes this team Sub-Zero.

Red Bull: A team owned by the most famous energy drink in the world and my personal favourite. However they are underpeforming. This causes them to be Cool rather than Sub-Zero.

Ferrari: The Prancing Horse. The most famous team in Formula one. The biggest rivals of the FIA. How could they not be Sub-Zero? Well the answer is simple. Fernando Alonso. He alone makes this team Seriously Uncool.

Williams: The poor man's McLaren. A team that hasn't won anything for years. They also run the FIA favourite Cosworth engine. There's nothing cool about them. They are Seriously Uncool.

Renault: Is this really a Renault team? Renaul own 25% of the team. The other 75% i owned by Gerad Lopez and his Genii Capital from Luxembourg. The car works so they're only Uncool.

Force India: They are basically McLaren in different colours. The team has been called "McLaren Lite". That is Uncool

Toro Rosso: The easiest one on the list I think. Toro Rosso are Red Bull's JUNIOR team. That is Seriously Uncool

Lotus: Oh God. Lotus are pretending they are the same team Colin Chapman made. They aren't. They are using the Cosworth engine. FIA favourite. If that isn't uncool enough, they are sponsored by CNN. Case closed, Lotus are without a doubt Seriously Uncool

Hispania: The team came very close to being uncool but I can't ignore the name of they're young driver. Bruno SENNA. That makes this team Cool

Sauber: Underachieving in races and one of their drivers has not yet finished a race. This team is therefore Seriously Uncool

Virgin: Finally Richard Branson's team. It has all the cool about it that anytime could possibly need. The only way the could screw this up, it to make complete arses of themselves. Oh wait, their fuel tank in too small. This team is therefore Seriously Uncool.

Drivers will be up later today.

Chinese Grand Prix

Er...Sorry.

It's been far too long and I should have done this earlier, but I think I can make up for it.


Well the report. Sebastian Vettel took pole position again. He failed to win again. Red Bull locked out a One-Two on the grid but failed to make an impact in the race. It's amazing what a little rain can do. There was nothing unusual about the starting grid. Front-runners were where they should be and the newbies were at the back. Qualifying was not all that interesting.

So why not move onto the race, which was fantastic. At the very beginning there was an incident when Fernando Alonso jumped the lights. This earned him a drive through penalty (you're all familiar with this term right?) If not then I'll explain. A drive through penalty means the driver on whom the penalty is imposed on must drive through the pit lane at a reduced speed. Well the victim was Alonso.

Then the rain. Jenson Button mimicked his smarts in Australia and got himself to the front of the pack. Jenson Button braved the damp conditions on slick tyres and he flew. Speaking of flying the major flyer of the race was actually McLaren's other driver. Lewis Hamilton was being a daring driver and making moves work. He also fufiled a dream. He raced against the seven time world champion Michael Schumacher wheel to wheel. Schumacher's recent struggles saw Hamilton come away as the victor but the wise head of Schumacher put up a fight.

Schumacher also jousted with the man said to be the next Michael Schumacher. Namely Sebastian Vettel. Vettel had an easier time due to the superiority of his Red Bull. After Vettel came Webber. It seemed that everyone wanted a piece of the seven time world champion. Schumacher eventually finished 10th.

Felipe Massa and Mark Webber fitted in at 9th and 8th but the big suprise was the man in 7th. Vitaly Petrov picked up his first points in Formula 1 with a solid drive. He fully earned those points and in my opinion he may just be one to watch for the future. Sebastian Vettel finished in a dissapointing 6th place. He was behind the Renault of Robert Kubica. He is making that Renault go fast, well done Robert. Despite his drive through penalty, Fernando Alonso finished 4th unable so beat the three silver cars.

Nico Rosberg in the Mercedes picked up another podium finishafter finishing 3rd. The story of the day however was McLaren's first One-Two since Monza 2007 when Fernando Alonso lead Lewis Hamilton to the finish line. This time Jenson Button lead Lewis Hamilton. It was also the first British One-Two since Damon Hill-David Coulthard back in 1995. I'm sorry if this isn't up to standard. I really am.

2010 Malaysian Grand Prix

Before I start talking about the race, I have to say a big thank you to Jennifer for the feedback. I hope I am able to get this entry near perfect. I would also like to thank Sarah and Vic for following my blog. I really didn't think it would get any followers so big thanks to you two.

Moving on to the main event. The heavens opened and the rain poured all through Friday practice and Saturday showed no signs of improvement. Mark Webber took a gamble during qualifying and beat the rain to take pole position by 1.3 seconds (believe me when I say that's a lot). He was the lucky one. The rain pushed Massa and Alonso in the Ferraris and Button and Hamilton in the McLarens to the back of the grid behind the two Lotus and Virgin cars.

The race was completely different. There was not a drop of rain all race. In the first corner Sebastian Vettel jumped the cars of Rosberg and Webber to take the lead and he never gave it up. That was the boring part of the race. The Red Bull RB6 might be fragile, but it is faster than 60,000 Manchester United fans leaving Old Trafford after an embarrassing FA Cup third round defeat.

The action was going on behind the top three. Hamilton, Button, Massa and Alonso all charged down the field with different rates of success. Hamilton flew past everything put in front of him. He did however have a little trouble against Renault's Vitaly Petrov. Button had a relatively easy time but the Ferraris weren't so lucky. They were held up by none other than Toro Rosso's Jaime Alguersuari. The very same Alguersuari who gave Michael Schumacher hell one week ago. The Ferraris just couldn't get passed him until he pitted.

I mentioned Alguersuari and Schumacher for a reason. Michael Schumacher remembered what it feels like to not finish a race as he had a problem with his wheel. Jaime Alguersuari along with Nico Hulkenberg scored their first F1 points finishing 9th and 10th respectively.

Back to the luck of the prancing horse. After getting around Alguersuari Ferrari's next target was the McLaren of Jenson Button. Massa got passed, but Mr. Alonso failed to deliver. On the last lap, Alonso made an attempt and ended up producing a fantastic spray of smoke from his engine. He was out. Massa finished the race and found himself leading the championship.

Onto the new teams, Lotus didn't have much luck at their home grand prix which is different to the other two teams. Virgin Racing's Lucas di Grassi achieved the first finish of their debut season. Hispania Racing got both Karun Chandhok and Bruno Senna to the finish line. Who knows? Perhaps we'll see them scoring points. Next stop: Shanghai, China!!!